Two Months!

Yep, it has been two months since my last trip here. I just haven't felt like sitting still for long periods of time and writing. Really, nothing to share. Well, there is but once again, I was just letting it happen instead of writing about what I want to happen. With this in mind, I think I am being more productive and I am happy. I am in love. Gushy kind of love. The kind that makes me giggle at little pink hearts and dream big dreams. The best part is that he loves me. Oh, yeah, I am in love with him at the same time as he is in love with me. I know it happens all the time, but wow, think about that. To be in love at the same time just amazes me. I remember being about six in the front of my mom's car, without a seatbelt (70's) and wondering out loud how hard that must be. She told me it would happen one day to me, and she didn't lie.

Enough about that. I just threw it out to the universe, but there is no need to ram it down your throat. It is what it is.

With that said, here is a new recipe: http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=216757

I modified the recipe by using Frank Red Hots because is there really any other kind. No, I think not. It is the sauce that counts, after all. Also, if you are looking for a healthier lifestyle check out sparkpeople.com. All the benefits of other weight loss sites but FREE. Gotta love that.

Now time for something completely different:

A personal message to the one who once knew he that should not be named: Look, I know what happened, and I don't blame you, and I am not looking for confrontation. Yes, many lives were hurt, including two very special people whom I love, but like all good disasters, many factors contributed to the ship sinking. I am not a victim. My life is better than ever, and it took the disaster for me to find true peace and happiness; however, I won't be thanking you anytime soon. It is always a rough road when trust is destroyed, but know, at one time I called you friend, and there lies the rub. Every action has a positive or negative reaction. Many years ago our worlds exploded from said actions, and even today, on peaceful sunny days, vibrations are still felt. Those vibrations will be felt for many of us for several more years to come, but thankfully, we have the grace to move forward instead of going backwards. To directly confront you would be, at least for me, one huge step backwards. So, I just type this to be said and removed from the swirling in my my head. I don't absolve nor do I need to forgive, but I must have my say. I was the only one without a voice and now I am heard.

Happy New Year

They say what you are doing on New Year's Eve will be what you will do for the rest of the year.  Sounds good to me.  I was surrounded by friends and laughing.  I felt love, joy, and peace.  There was excellent food and conversation, and messages from the one who couldn't be there but has my heart.  Yes, I can handle that for the rest of the year.

Normally, I hate the new year.  It is my least favorite holiday.  From Halloween to Christmas, my life is filled with fun, planning, and anticipation, and then...blah.  Doesn't help my birthday is in January, so I have a reminder I am a year older.  From this bah-humbug approach to the new year I have formed my resolution.  No dieting since I have been working on that still from last year.  No, I don't smoke.  I am focusing instead of finding the good in January, February, March, and well, you get the idea.  I plan on prayerfully finding a purpose other than what I see on the surface. I am removing the obstructions that threaten my joy.  I am loved by somebody, and I sometimes doubt.  I do not doubt him, but I worry and doubt the fact we can actually have a future.  I doubt myself.  No guarantees in life, but I pessimistically rip apart the peace that should come with the joy of connecting with the twin flame. Sometimes I even doubt I will find happiness with somebody, and that isn't fair to me.  I read yesterday that misery is in the anticipation.  Basically I anticipate the worse and then I find my misery.  You know, we may one day break up. Don't want that, but bad things happen; however, I will look to finding hope in anticipation instead of despair.  I will hope for the best, plan for the best, and deal with the worse if it does occur.  I will trust myself.  I will believe I am worth it this New Year.

May you find peace within yourself this year.

Wiinter Wonderland

The snow is amazing right now.  Huge, fluffy flakes are surrounding me, and I am sitting in wonder of it all.  I am not thinking of bad roads; I have no place to go.  I am not thinking of anything but this moment, this place, and this time.  I am thinking of rich hot chocolate with fresh whipped cream and candy canes.  I am thinking of apple, cranberry, and walnut pie for tonight's dessert.  I am thinking of my granny's potato soup, and how she makes it perfectly.  I am thinking of a blue eyed man who I believe is also thinking of me.  I am thinking of going sledding with two children who still believe in the magic of it all.  Perfection is here and not within the open packages that still reside under the tree.  Today and this one moment will last a lifetime. 

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, it can be a season to be stressed, tired, overwhelmed, and all of the above, but for you,  I hope it is also a time of blessings, peace, and good will toward men.  I wish you all the happiness in the world to you and yours. 

I am getting ready to head into the kitchen to prep for my Christmas Eve luncheon.  My family gathers here prior to church to watch my kids open their gifts, and I usually just do finger foods:  Paula Deen's chicken salad, variety of breads, cheese ball, and sweet and sour meatballs.  Dessert will be eggnog pound cake, cookies, cookies, cookies, and a chocolate chip cheese ball.

Here is the link for the chicken salad:  http://www.food.com/recipe/paula-deens-pecan-chicken-salad-377918

Can't forget the chocolate cheese ball.  This is the first time I have made it, and may I just say wow!  I want to thank my friend K. for mentioning it on Facebook,  I so have to make it again next weekend for New Year's:  http://allrecipes.com//Recipe/chocolate-chip-cheese-ball/Detail.aspx

To my children:  I love you, and you are blessings on every level.  I believe in you always, and thank you for teaching the truth behind unconditional.
To my love:  Well, after seventeen years, we are finally getting it right.  I thank God every day for you finding me again. You were my past, you are now my present, and yes, you will be my future. 
To my parents:  Thank you.  You have my back always, and I am very blessed to have been raised by two moral, loving people. 
To many of students:  It has been a year since you said goodbye to a friend, and I remember him as well.  I pray you will find peace.

To one who knows:  You can say anything you want, but I will not dwell in the drama that you create.

I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.  ~Charles Dickens

Country Living's Onion Pie

Today I began testing a few recipes for our upcoming Christmas party.  To be honest, I didn't want to try an onion pie for the first time at the party, and it is a snow day after all.  It was either this or catch up on the other 130 things I need to do by this weekend, and food always wins. 

I found the recipe in Country Living magazine, and here is the link:  http://www.countryliving.com/recipefinder/onion-pie-recipe-clv1210

It doesn't get any easier than this.  It only took about ten minutes after the onion were sauteed.  It is basically mix, bake, forget.   Of course, my Thing Two won't touch it.  In fact, as he helped me crack the eggs, he said could not understand why anybody would want to ruin a perfectly good pie by adding onions.  Thing One is older and has a more sophisticated taste.  She puts ranch dressing on her french fries.  She really liked it, but on Saturday, she wants me to add more bacon.  My opinion?  I like it, and more bacon won't hurt at all. About two more slices.  It isn't a main dish with the rather rich flavor but it is a great appetizer.  I may even use it again as a side dish.  Yes, this is one recipe that will staying in my little red recipe box.  

You Know You Are a Scrooge...

by annonymous:
If your only contact with three spirits on Christmas Eve is gin, vodka and bourbon -- you just might be a Scrooge

If you turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve to keep carolers away -- you just might be a Scrooge

If you buy all of your Christmas gifts at a store that also sells gas -- you just might be a Scrooge

If you get your Christmas Tree at a rest stop at night -- you just might be a Scrooge

If you give bathroom fixtures as Christmas gifts -- you just might be a Scrooge

If your favorite Christmas movie is Jurassic Park - you just might be a Scrooge

If your idea of Christmas dinner is a six pack of beer and a cheese log - you just might be a Scrooge

If you think "Ho, Ho, Ho" is a line from a Rocky movie -- you just might be a Scrooge

If your favorite pastime is putting defective bulbs in your neighbors' string of Christmas lights or defacing Christmas lawn characters with eggnog - you just might be a Scrooge

If your only holiday decoration is a rotting pumpkin - you just might be a Scrooge

Snow Day!!!!!!

The kids and I are home for our first snow day, and I know this will be a pain in May, but for now, this is bliss.  The housework is finished, so I have a few hours to just be lazy, and I can really do lazy.  In fact, I think I have it down as an art form.  I have Christmas music playing, snow falling, and hot chocolate with whipped cream and peppermint.  Ahhhhhhh.

Well the kiddies are drinking chocolate, but I have a cup of Russian Tea, and it is my favorite winter time treat.  I had an email yesterday asking for the recipe, so I am going to give two.  One is for you who prefer to steep your own tea.  The other is a mix I make and store in an airtight container. 
Russian Spice Tea : 

Instant Russian Tea :  I use this one, but I did change it a little.   I cut back on the tang by 1/8 cup and added 1/8 cup of instant lemonade.  I also like to use the mix as last minute gifts during the holiday season.  Take a dollar store basket and fix it with a mason jar with pancake mix, assorted syrups, and Russian tea.  Yummy.